Author Archive for Kevin

Awake o sleepers!

Published by Kevin on February 10, 2010 in Weekly.

Ephesians 5:14, “Therefore He says: ‘Awake, you who sleep, arise from the dead, and Christ will give you light.’ ”

I have been in this tense battle lately.   Allow me to ramble about this.   I speak of the battle where the most important things I want to get done are put aside more and more, and the least important things are taking more  and more from me.   It’s the age-old struggle of the one who has committed his heart, even his life, to living out Psalm 27:4.  It’s what the Song of Songs calls the “little foxes” that steal the grapes.  I’m living in this tension of making time for the things that my heart desires versus the things that seemingly “have to get done” in the day-to-day life.  Why does it seem like there’s the hollywood version of my spiritual life that I’d like to live, and then there’s the WNY version that I’m settling for?

I have 4 kids who I’d love to see leading a prayer set in a house of prayer someday – seven days a week, of course.  I imagine my girl singing her heart out from the Psalms or the Song of Solomon, because of the love that’s alive inside of her.  I see my three boys praying diligently for healing, prophecy, and salvation to break out in the Western New York region.  I can see God’s heart moved by their petitions, and their songs of devotion, and I can even see Him releasing it, “just because.”  It feels like I can see this thing happening so clearly, but then I wake up from my dream and see that it’s 8am and I have to get dressed, shovel the snow off my car, and get to work for my 9 to 5 job.

Interesting to me that we’ve started this blog about “living a lifestyle of prayer in a busy world”, and most of what we’re doing is struggling through the mud and talking about it.  At our meetings, we’re encouraging one another along and pressing in to see more of God’s presence, and we are even graced with His presence, but then the meeting’s over and we all go our separate ways… back to our homes, back to our jobs.

At home, we pray with our kids throughout the day for various things.  We talk about Jesus and what He’s done for us, how much He loves us, and who He is to us.  The kids love to pray – they even add to each others’ prayers at the dinner table (it’s cute to see).  One time, Anna forgot to ask Jesus to heal us (we’ve all been sick the past two weeks), so Elijah decided to add that at the end of Anna’s prayer.  Anna responded with, “LET ME!  …and Jesus heal us, amen.”   Anna and Elijah are learning verses to memorize  each week, and they are doing really well with them.  We stress forgiveness in their relationships with each other, and with us parents.  Is it enough?  I can’t help but wonder if they’ll be equipped for the days ahead.  Maybe my concern is a good thing.

I look at this “WNY version” of my life and I realize that the struggle is tough, but maybe eventually it’ll be rewarding.  I have to stay up quite late some nights just to get some time with my Bible… with my Lord.   And then there are other nights where I wished I would have opened my Bible.  I wish that I could have had some “face time” with God before I headed into the next day.   The ache inside of me continues to bring me back to this reality that without Jesus, I have no light… I have no truth… I have no peace.  Tonight is one of those late nights where I do have my Bible open, and I am listening to Him.  I am remembering that I do need to “stay awake”, as Paul says to the Ephesians, “Awake, you who sleep, arise from the dead, and Christ will give you light.”

There are many questions that still fill my head at this stage of my life.   For Leah and I, living this life and seeking God as we plan our family’s steps is full of questions.

I keep coming back to this verse… “Christ will give you light.”   In our dark (immature) understanding, Jesus has faithfully brought His light.  There will be questions and there will be struggles in the days to come.  I want to know that I have God’s promises fresh on my mind, and etched on my heart.  Isn’t that part of the struggle? – to question why you’re here?  to question why you do what you do?  It’s easy to get caught up in the doubt, especially when the culture around me hasn’t made the same committments as me, and unfortunately, they may not even believe in God.

As I read a couple of verses through in Ephesians 5:15-17, “see then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil.  Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is,”  I realize that Paul had some insight into the struggle of which I am speaking.  He was speaking to the Ephesians about something more than love.  He was talking to them about the discipline of love.  That may be a topic for another blog, but Paul introduces the topic in Eph 5:2, “and walk in love…“  and he then expounds on this walk in more detail throughout chapter 5.  He is speaking of the walk that’s entailed in loving Jesus.

Maybe we’ve made our commitments to this fasted lifestyle, or to this love for Jesus, or a re-commitment, or however we worded it.  Now we’re here together wondering, “what’s next?”  Well, may I say that the next step is to start to walk out this love with discipline - with commitment?  Let’s change our lives around and put Christ back in the center.  We’re in this for the lengthy ride.

Let’s awaken our hearts.  Let’s redeem the time.  It may sound odd, but let’s dare to go on this journey with our Savior.  As I think about it, this WNY version IS the hollywood version.

Jesus give us grace to pursue Your Heart as You desire us to, amen.

- Kevin

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Temptation

Published by Kevin on November 14, 2009 in Weekly.

This weekend I’ve been reading Acts 8:1-8.

This verse in particular has caught my attention (v1), ” At that time a great persecution arose against the church which was at Jerusalem; and they were all scattered throughout the regions of Judea and Samaria,”

I’ve been bombarded with the real temptations to get caught up in the busy life that surrounds me. I work a 9-5 job, Monday to Friday, that I feel God placed me 8 years ago.  I have 4 kids, and my wife.  I have the dirty diaper changes, the breakfast to make when the wife needs to sleep in (b/c our newborn kept her up the night before, and yes, I do make breakfast at other times as well), the homeschooling to help with, the house to clean with the kids, the kids to play with, the car’s oil to change, the computer just crashed so I have to fix it, the wood to stack (we heat our home with wood(, and then there’s the FOTB prayer that we’re involved in.  It certainly takes a measure of discipline to keep my eyes fixed on the simple and steady things that God’s word calls us to walk through.  The temptation to let a busy life sweep me away is something that I face – I know my wife feels the same way.

As I consider the verse above, I can’t imagine having a major hub being displaced in such a dramatic fashion.  I look around the world today, knowing of some major missions centers, but none can compare to the beginnings of something like what was had in Jerusalem. I think of how much calamity must have been taking place around those people who were followers of Christ.  Some were most likely newbies, others may have been followers for some time, and then the others were the apostles.

I think of the real threats that people in that day had to live with.  Here, in my life, I concern myself with things like: knowing Jesus, food, shelter, and health for my wife and kids.  These just don’t seem as imminent a threat as what may have existed in those days of Jerusalem.

I wonder about the fathers and mothers of that day.  There are those parents who took a chance to believe what was spoken of Jesus and now were being persecuted because of their beliefs.  They must have been concerned for the safety of their children.  There must have been some inner questioning of their choice to believe the words of Jesus.  The fathers and mothers had to keep things together enough to move these families out into Judea and Samaria.  I think things like, “Where did they go?  How did they make the choice about where to flee?”

There is truly much to the story that we may not know.  There must be personal stories of great things that God did in their midst during this time.  There must have been families who moved together with other families, and this built a sense of community, fellowship, and accountability.  There certainly was worship and prayer involved.  This is what keeps me encouraged.  God knows us enough to place us within a community of believers who will encourage us towards the best things (Matt 22:37).  In this context we will struggle through the hard and challenging stuff together.  We will have people to pray for us and to pray with us.  At our FOTB prayer times, there are men who are sitting there, elbow-to-elbow, praying together with me because they see that it’s the best thing for them to do for their families and for their life in God.  There are mothers there who have chosen that time as sacred for the purpose of agreeing with God and His Word.  If you have a chance, come pray with us on a Friday night.

On Friday nights, as I sit there with this group, I am constantly reminded by the Holy Spirit of Acts 6:4-5, and the call to that kind of lifestyle of prayer; that kind of intimate friendship with God.  Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like the longer I know Christ, the more I depend on Him.  There’s comfort in knowing that I can continue to trust Him; in knowing that the Father is good (Ps 25:6-11), and He desires for me to know Him.  Lord, awaken our hearts!


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The discovery of friendship

Published by Kevin on October 7, 2009 in Weekly.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately on friendship with God.  In this friendship with Him, God has opened my eyes to things around me that I had not noticed in the past.  He is truly a great and committed friend.

As I consider friendship, I also think of other relationships in my life that I am thankful for – my best friend is my wife; my children are truly a blessing to spend time with; the FOTBWNY crew is a great group of die-hards who love to pray, worship, and love Jesus; and there are also the friends we have at church (Niagara Falls Vineyard).  I really enjoy these relationships that God has placed in my life.  I am more and more thankful for the ups and downs that I’ve encountered with all the friends who are in my life right now.  If forgiveness were a muscle, I’d say we’ve all had quite a workout during the time we’ve grown to know each other as friends.

In January 1998, my life was given brand new meaning.  That year is when I had a significant encounter with Jesus.  I felt ready to begin life anew  and ready to learn more about this mysterious Trinity – Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.  I think we were near a place called Thunder Rock in Alleghany State Park (if I remember correctly).  This was day two of our weekend retreat .  There was several of us from a UB campus ministry group that wanted to know God more, so we did the extreme – we went on a weekend retreat to spend time away from everything else, and to dedicate time with God.  We had time for bible study, prayer for each other, and fun time by the campfire.  We also did something I didn’t expect – we went for a walk out in the woods to focus our attention on God.  That’s when it happened for me.  The Holy Spirit met me out there in the woods.  On my knees crying my eyes out,  I felt the Holy Spirit’s presence in an amazingly tangible way.

Dreams. Visions. Prophecy. Prayer. Fasting.  I couldn’t get enough information about these topics after this retreat; after that encounter with the Holy Spirit.  I had to know more about this Holy Spirit who came and turned me inside out.  I had to know more about this Jesus who loved me so much.  I had to know who this kind and gentle Father is in heaven.  I dove into ANY and EVERY book I could find on these topics  and I continually found myself returning to the Bible and to the simplicity of prayer.  Much of that time period is a blur for me because there was so much good and bad that happened during the learning process (that’s where forgiveness has taken place).

One thing remains vivid on my heart during that time period – my intimate friendship with Jesus.  When I looked for Him, He was there.  I could find Him in the highs and in the lows.  He was always with me, guiding me and cheering me on as I stumbled and fumbled my way forward.

Today, more than ten years later, here I sit with my children getting ready for bed…  all of them have some likeness of me.  I enjoy being with these four little ones that God has given my wife and I.  I enjoy seeing how they have such a simple devotion to mom and dad, and the simple yet rich depth to the relationships we are building with each other individually and as a family.  God has used these little ones so many times to reveal something of who HE IS to me, and something of who I am to Him.  Many times these revelations are about how I’m made in His likeness, and how He has such an enjoyment with MY baby steps in my life with Him and with my family.  He is the smiling happy God who loves to watch me grow.

Malachi 4:5-6 says, “Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord.  And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers.”

How humbling it is that such a Mysterious, Holy, Majestic, and Beautiful God desires such simple, yet rich, depth to my friendship with Him.  He is truly committed to each one of us beyond what we could imagine.  He is drawing my heart to Him and to my children as I continue to wonder at his Beauty and Mystery.  My prayer is that fathers in FOTBWNY and fathers in the churches in this area would set their hearts and minds on the Triune God, and position themselves to pursue the knowledge of Him (Prov 2:1-9).  The time is at hand for us to “go deep” in the things of God.

- Kevin

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What are we in this for?

Published by Kevin on August 30, 2009 in Weekly.

First, welcome to this blog.  We will be posting something new at least once a week.  I hope you return to take a look at what’s going on with us, and hopefully it will be a source of encouragement to you as you seek to define what it means to live out a lifestyle of prayer.  Please feel free to leave comments to any of our blog posts.  I hope these posts will entice some good discussion on prayer and any related topics.

There are going to be a few contributors to this blog, which will hopefully give us some good perspective on different experiences that our group, fotbwny, is having in this journey we call a lifestyle of prayer.  Being a father of 4, and a full-time worker at a local non-profit organization, I can say that a lifestyle of prayer certainly isn’t what I thought it would look like when I started.  I suppose that’s part of the discovery in our relationship with God – to figure out the particulars.  I remember being a new, Spirit-filled Christian, and thinking that I would be a full-time intercessor who spoke God’s Word to those who needed to hear it.  In my mind, the picture was that I would be living in a secluded place all by myself, with a torn-up old bible in one hand, and some grasshoppers for supper in the other hand.  I imagined that this call to prayer was going to have me fasting for days, even months, on end and being taken somewhere on the other side of the earth where I would speak with angels and maybe even the Lord Himself!

Little did I know that God’s plan for my life included a much easier road, physically (not such extreme fasting), and a very fulfilling relationship with my family (I’m not secluded in some hut all alone).    In those early days of not knowing as much, I planned that I would be able to recite much (if not all) of the Bible and know what big events would come to the world ahead of time.  It’s funny how lofty my goals were.  My heart was certainly there, but I had some growing up to do.

As I read through the New Testament, I am continually reminded at how much effort Jesus put to focus on the 12 guys around Him.   He spent much time building those relationships and nurturing their spirits through personal teaching.   It seems to me that if I spent time with Jesus alongside the 12, there would be a good sense of comradery and depth to the friendships that I’d have with Jesus and those twelve disciples.  It seemed like this was something that was built and it took effort to sustain it.   I’m encouraged that Jesus chose this close friendship to be the foundation on which to introduce Himself; there were many miracles performed, there was the truth of God being taught, and there were many eyes being opened – spiritually.

Lately our group has been focusing on healing.  We’ve all felt the Holy Spirit speaking to us individually about praying for healing.  Unfortunately, we have noticed an increase in the friends and family around us who are suffering from various ailments.  We are determined to continue asking God for an outpouring of healing on our loved ones.   What’s really great is that I’m part of a community of friends who feel the same sense of urgency for justice.   We are being roused to fight for those close to us.  God is using this as an opportunity to show us His heart for people in this region.  S0 we’re learning this on a small scale as we pray for our loved ones, and it gives us insight as we petition God to release healing on a bigger scale (Western New York and Southern Ontario).  I’m humbled that God would bring together a group of individuals who desire to see the greater works being released in this generation.  We may not see large crowds gathering with us lakeside, or be called to feed five thousand with a few loaves and fishes, but we do have the blessing of God knitting our hearts together as we pursue the knowledge of Him.  I think we’re realizing that effectiveness in prayer isn’t about counting the numbers who are praying beside you.  Instead, it’s about seeing that our hearts and minds are aligning with the God of the Bible, the Infinite and Beautiful One who beckons us to come discover who He is – and agree with what He desires to do in prayer.   Thus, we press in to pray for the release of what He’s promised in His Word, and He’s faithfully releasing understanding on our hearts and minds about His ways.  We sometimes even see people healed.

I desire to see this generation commit to prayer like never before – for the sake of God’s kindgom being released on this region.  More than this, I desire that this generation would come to a deeper, and continual, revelation of this man Jesus Christ – in whom we have eternal life  (John 17:3, Eph 3:14-21)  So, Lord Come!  Yes, even to Southern Ontario,  even to Western New York.  We know you love us.

- Kevin

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Welcome to our blog!

Published by Kevin on August 21, 2009 in General.

We’ll be posting articles, teachings, and other info relevant to prayer in Western New York.

Please register if you’d like to leave comments to any of our posts.   Thank you.

- Kevin

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